Well, truth be told, we actually need friends, period.
TW and I have been most spectacularly unsuccessful in keeping any type of friendship with people we’ve known over the years. Oh sure, we have friends that we can talk to about normal daily stuff, but we really don’t have anyone we can talk sex with. Online friends don’t count. No, they really don’t. Nice try though. 😉
Anyway, yesterday I was thinking about (and surfing porn about) TW getting fucked by a black guy. The thought and vision of a large black dick stretching her pussy lips out as the guy fucks her had me hard all afternoon. Anyway, I realized that for the most part, it’s my though alone. I really can’t tell anyone about it. TW’s tired of hearing it and with her back problems, let’s be realistic, it’s NEVER gonna happen.
It would be kinda cool to talk to someone about it though. Just to get the thoughts out of my head and out in the open. I can’t just call up my brother and talk about it. Nor do I have any close friends who I can chat with either. It’s frustrating for me. TW has a female friend or two, but they’re pretty vanilla. I don’t think she’d be comfortable with TW telling them she’d like a big, fat, black cock splitting her pussy open, or that she’d like to be gang banged in the woods and covered in cum.
Both of us are frustrated by this but seem incapable of rectifying the situation. We originally thought swinging might get us those friendships but we never really connected with anyone, as most of you know who’ve been following us for any length of time. I can kid around with the ladies at work but again, you don’t shit in the place you eat, or maybe it’s the Pope is a bear and he shits in the woods, or something like that. Besides, I’d love to have TW with me when we’re fucking other people. We’re a TEAM!
I thought at one time that TW’s sister, X, would be okay with talking about shit, but we got the “I don’t want to talk about it,” blow off from her. This is the one who, when we were younger, would tell us about shit her and her ex did on their vacations. Nothing swinger-like but it was nice to hear about her having her brains fucked out. Of course, these days she’s become rather a prude, always telling TW to cover her cleavage. Again, when she (X) was younger I’d always be catching glimpses of cleavage and panty from her. WTF happened to her?
I always feel like time is running out. When we were younger, it was TW who was hesitant to make things happen. I’ve told you about J, my friend from high school. We had an all oral 3-way with him but haven’t been successful getting him bed again. Then the kids came along and our lives revolved around them. Then, there was Mr. Creepy. Thankfully, we haven’t seen him or his tiny dick in a long time. Like I said, thankfully. As we’ve gotten older though, it’s now me that is shying away from suggesting things. I’ve got to the point of, “Why bother? I’m just going to be disappointed, AGAIN”
I feel the time has run out for us to have sex with others. Lately, it seems that thoughts of group sex or sex with others has conditioned me to get angry and hateful. I get going into the fantasy then realize, “Wait, TW’s back problem. Wait, TW will find some excuse not to do it. Wait, you’re a fast disgusting pig, who the fuck would have sex with you? Wait, we’re too damn old now. Wait, wait, wait!”
I’m Pavlov’s Dog. I’m now conditioned to hate the thing that would have brought me the most pleasure, although, the more I think about it, I’ll probably never be happy, no matter what happens. Having a long drive home does this to me. Too much time to think.
I’ve decided to put my energy to other, more productive, uses. Now that spring sport season is done, I can go out and look for a part time job. I really don’t think TW’s back problem is gonna be solved easily, and I highly doubt she’ll be back at work any time soon. So, as the only bread winner in the family, I need to get another job. We’re just not gonna make it on my salary alone. Nobody’s fault but mine. I’m going to start looking after Memorial Day. I’m already versed in the phrases, “Would you like the meal, or just the sandwich? Would you like to try one of our new salads? Good evening, welcome to Sam’s Club/Wal-Mart/Dollar General/K-Mart. Have you thought about what would happen if you die? Pay us Mother-Fucker or we’ll break your legs! Would you like to try a Hot Apple Pie today?”
Yep, it’s gonna be a great life from here on out.